Two drunk fellows accosted me while walking my bike along Leith Walk, a busy street.

HIM: 'Ey mate, what's up with the bicycle at this hour?

ME: Sorry?

HIM: Bit late for a bicycle, en't it?

ME: Well—

HIM: Edinburgh's the most dangerous place, mate, take it from me. I've seen guys run red lights and all kinds of stuff.

ME: Yeah.

A taxi approaches.

HIM: Hey! Hey!

The taxi's light goes off.

HIM (to his mate): ot's'up wi'him, eh? Ye'd think e'd want a fare. (to me) Don't drive drunk, alright, cause it's dangerous, and you could get hit. Lemme tell you, he's drunk (pointing to his friend) and he'll kill you.

MATE (grinning cheerily): Well, I apologize in advance if I ever do in the future.

ME: If you ever kill me, you mean?

MATE: Yeh.

ME: Oh, thanks, I'll appreciate that.

A bicycle rickshaw approaches.

HIM (ecstatic, to the rickshaw pedaller, who is stopped just beside us): Hey! Hey! Hey! Arright, we got it. (to me again) So listen, don't drive drunk, and you'll be fine. We gotta go. Cheers.

ME: Cheers.